Highland Mindfulness Group

This page contains the talks, meditation practices and other information related to the introductory and deepening insight meditation courses from 2021 and 2022 starting with the introductory talk and a basic “Coming to Rest” meditation practice.
Other pages on this website that are relevant to this course include “Ways of looking,” “Emotional Realisation” and “How to meditate in silence“.

INTRODUCTORY TALK FROM TUESDAY THE 2ND FEBRUARY 2021.

“COMING TO REST” meditation practice from Tuesday the 2nd February 2021. A basic insight meditation practice designed to allow the mind and body to rest in an open and receptive state – just under 30mins in length.

SESSION 1 – HOW TO STOP TRYING.

You can find a description of techniques, to help us to come to rest and observe our experience, in the “Ways of Looking” page on this website. Please also remember that you learn and insight arises from your own mind as you begin to practise these meditation techniques. You are your own teacher.

Practice 1 – Coming to our meditation practice, settling and being aware of our intentions, our motivations and allowing ourselves to rest in the moment. A 28min meditation practice recorded on Tuesday the 9th February 2021.

Practice 2 – Releasing the desire to achieve, attain an outcome or hold on to anything in our meditation practice and being with our experience just as it is. A 29minute meditation practice recorded on Tuesday the 9th February 2021.

Practice 3 – “Letting go of any hope of achieving anything” practice. A 30minute practice recorded on Monday the 30th August 2021 in which participants are invited to come into a deep sense of relaxation and let go of any sense of trying to attain any outcomes from their meditation practice.

Practice 4 – Being with the experience of our 5 external senses and the activity of our minds. A 29minute practice in which participants are invited to open all of their senses including that of awareness of the mind and rest with all that they experience. Recorded on Monday the 30th August 2021.

SESSION 2 – STAYING OPEN.

Staying open to whatever arises during meditation requires considerable practice since our every instinct is to avoid the unpleasant and unwanted in our minds. If we are going to practice insight meditation successfully it is essential that we learn to do this otherwise we will be distancing ourselves from much of what resides in the mind and rendering ourselves unable to learn from it.

There are a variety of techniques that can help us to remain open of which the first 2 are maintaining an open posture and using the sense of opening as the body breathes in.

Practice 1 – Staying open using the breath. A 30minute meditation practice recorded on Tuesday the 16th February 2021.

When difficult thoughts and feelings arise in the mind we can help ourselves to remain open to them by connecting with the sense of space that awareness brings. This enables us to view them as if from a distance and to develop a sense of perspective that otherwise can disappear when the mind constricts around difficulties. We can also use an open questioning technique such as saying “What is this?” to ourselves during meditation practice to help us adopt an attitude of curiosity and interest to whatever is arising. A curious and interested mind is much more likely to remain open than a mind that wishes to reject and suppress.

Practice 2 – Staying open when things are difficult. A 28minute meditation practice recorded on Tuesday the 16th February 2021.

Practice 3 – Resting in a state of openness to whatever arises. A 32minute meditation practice in which we start by letting go of any expectations, settle into an open body posture and then use a variety of techniques to enable the mind to remain open even when difficulties arise. Recorded on Monday the 6th September 2021.

Practice 4 – The unacceptable thought meditation – using compassion to help us to remain open even when he most difficult thoughts and feelings arise. A 28minute practice recorded on Monday the 6th September 2021.

SESSION 3 – THE POWER OF SILENCE.

It is very easy to allow ourselves to be guided through a meditation practice following the voice of a facilitator and gently ignoring what may be arising for us in favour of the words that are being given to us. Silent meditation practice, that is without the support of someone guiding, allows us to experience what is arising in our own minds as it is in the moment that it arises. Silent practice should become an essential part of our insight practice thought not necessarily the whole of our practice. In this session we have a chance to experience sitting in silence and then to explore the role of compassion, particularly self-compassion, as another component of our insight training.

Talk on the importance of being able to meditate in silence.

Practice 1 – Sitting in silence. A 25minute sitting practice in which participants are guided through the process of settling, grounding and resting and then invited to meditate in silence for the remainder of the practice. Recorded on Tuesday the 23rd February 2021.

Practice 2 – Flower of love and compassion practice. A 24minute sitting practice in which participants are invited to experience the power of their own innate sense of love and compassion. Compassion practice is important in the development of insight as it softens the mind enabling practitioners to be more open and accepting of whatever is arising into awareness. Recorded on Tuesday the 23rd February 2021.

Practice 3 – Conceptual proliferation – sitting in silence and observing the flow of thoughts through the mind and the processes of association, analysis and explanation. A 21minute meditation practice recorded on Monday the 13th September 2021.

Practice 4 – Softening and opening the mind through self-compassion. Realising the innate beauty and the capacity to be kind, loving and compassionate that lies within us all. Recorded on Monday the 13th September 2021.

SESSION 4 – RECOGNISING CONCEPTUAL PROLIFERATION.

During the course of our daily lives there is a strong tendency for our awareness to become drawn at any moment into the associations, reactivity and the stories that a simple stimulus, such as any thought, sight, sound, smell, taste or body sensation, might trigger for us. Our minds readily become entangled in a web of increasingly complex mental activity that is sometimes called conceptual proliferation. It is a process of amplification and fabrication that ensnares the mind in associations and stories in ways that are not helpful, that lead us to ruminate and sometimes to become obsessed and caught up in seemingly simple events. When we practice mindfulness our intention is to stay at or in contact with our basic experience which can be the breath, sound or any sensation arising through our 5 external senses. This enables us to let go of the grosser levels of the self-based narrative and proliferation of thought that characterises conceptual proliferation and begin to experience both the clarity of the present moment and the peacefulness that naturally arises as the mind releases thought and quietens. Realising conceptual proliferation and allowing the mind to quieten through basic mindfulness practice is the start of our process of gaining insight. Only as the mind becomes calmer and more peaceful can we begin to look deeper into the process that determine our reality.

Practice 1 – Staying in contact. A 28minute practice in which we sit in awareness and as best we can observe the activity of our minds letting go of distracting thoughts as and when they arise. Recorded on Tuesday the 2nd March 2021.

Practice 2 – Directing love and kindness to all of our experience. A 22minute practice in which we come to rest, open our external senses and our awareness of the mind and direct caring, kindness and love towards everything that arises. Recorded on Monday the 4th October 2021.

Practice 3 – Being with feelings. Recognising conceptual proliferation and releasing thought enables us to become less caught up in intellectual activity and to begin to be more aware of our feelings. As we connect more with our feelings we can begin to see that insight meditation is a feeling, rather than a thinking, process. This 25minute practice is designed to help us practise the art of being more aware of our feelings whilst letting go of our intellectual thought processes. Recorded on Tuesday the 2nd March 2021.

As we progress further in our insight meditation we will increasingly practise connecting with our feelings and exploring a world of cognition that involves feeling rather than intellectual thought.

PRACTICE MEDITATIONS (more meditation practices that can be used to support the first 4 sessions of this course).

Recording 1 – Attitudes to teaching and learning – you are your own teacher, always check everything that you are told against your own experience in meditation practice, avoid seeking security in a “teacher” and always be prepared to return to basics especially when you are feeling confident and secure in your practice. A brief 6minute talk to stress these points.

Recording 2 – The cycle of thought and being the observer. A 30minute meditation in which we practice observing and familiarise ourselves with the part of our mind that is capable of observing.

Recording 3 – The feeling body scan. A 33minute body scan in which we observe the feelings and emotions that we have in association with the physical sensations that are arising as we scan through the body.

Recording 4 – The old friend. A 30minute meditation in which we practise being kind, caring and loving towards our minds, our moment by moment experience and ourselves by using the analogy of the way we might feel towards an old and very dear friend.

Recording 5 – Observing our thoughts with kindness. A 30minute meditation practice in which we are invited to observe the arising and passing of our thoughts with an attitude of kindness and caring.

Recording 6 – Love and Forgiveness towards ourselves. A 25minute meditation practice which invites us to look at ourselves and regard what we observe with kindness, caring and compassion.

Recording 7 – Basic self-compassion practice. A 31minute meditation practice to help us generate feelings of compassion towards ourselves.

SESSION 5 – WHO AM I? – AM I MY THOUGHTS OR THE OBSERVER OF THOSE THOUGHTS?

When we rest our awareness on the breath (or on an external meditation support) and return to it every time our mind drifts away we begin to see that one part of the mind is capable of observing what the rest of the conscious, active mind is doing. The term observer or witness describes what is our natural capacity for self-reflective awareness – simply meaning our awareness of what we are thinking and feeling at any one time. At first it can be difficult to observe what the mind is doing because we get caught up in thinking very easily but as we continue to practice the ability to observe becomes clearer and more stable. At that point we can begin to look more closely at the mind and ask questions of ourselves – “Who am I – am I my thoughts or that which is capable of observing them?”

To answer this question requires looking deeper into the mind through feeling rather than thinking. In this we are beginning to leave behind not only the tendency to be caught in conceptual proliferation but also the superficial reactivity of many of our feelings and emotions. In other words we delving deeper into our feeling mind and allowing ourselves to experience deep seated attitudes, insecurities and fears arising from our conditioning. In the 2 basic insight meditations from this session we first practice being the observer and then consider the nature of that observer.

Practice 1 – Being the observer. A 26minute practice in which, after settling, grounding and coming to rest, we are invited to observe the flow of thought through the mind and notice how it feels to be the observer. Recorded on Tuesday the 6th April 2021.

Practice 2 – What is the observer doing? A 30minute meditation practice in which participants, after settling, grounding and coming to rest, are invited to be the observer of their thoughts and to consider the process of being the observer (“What is it that the observer is doing?”) and to reflect on the sense of self in relation to the observer. Recorded on Monday the 11th October 2021.

Practice 3 – The nature of the observer. A 27minute practice in which we are invited to gently begin the process of looking into the nature of the observer and to notice how this feels. This is followed by the question “Where in the mind does the sense of me or I reside?” Recorded on Tuesday the 6th April 2021.

Practice 4 – The nature of the observer 2. A 25minute practice in which participants are once again invited to observe the flow of their thoughts and to notice the manner in which the observer is interacting with the thoughts that it is observing. Is it seeking to control the flow or change it to suit itself? How does the sense of self interact with the observer? How does it feel to be meditating in this manner? Recorded on Monday the 11th October 2021.

SESSION 6 – THE EGOCENTRIC PREFERENCE SYSTEM.

Brief talk – On answers, questions and concepts – how we use them in insight practice. An 8minute talk on formulating appropriate questions to use in our insight practice and on the use of concepts.

In the session we are introduced to the concept of the Egocentric Preference System (EPS) as a useful tool in our insight practice. The EPS describes our individual system of judgement and preference as being part of our sense of self. As such it provides us with a way of looking at how one aspect of the sense of self is constructed. This will be covered in more detail in next week’s session.

Practice 1 – Observing judgement. A 28min practice in which we observe the judgements that we are making as we rest in our experience and in which we ask ourselves “Who is making the judgements?” Recorded on Tuesday the 13th April 2021.

Practice 2 – Observing the expression of preference. A 30minute practice in which participants are invited to observe the judgements or the expression of preference that their minds are making all the time and asking the question “Who is making the judgements?” This meditation is a version of Practice 1 above recorded on Monday the 18th October 2021.

Practice 3 – From where do the judgements that we make arise? A 28min practice in which we reflect on our own personal preference system and begin to consider how that system comes into being. Recorded on Tuesday the 13th April 2021.

Practice 4 – From where do the judgements/expressions of preference that we make arise? A 27minute practice recorded on Monday the 18th October 2021 as a version of practice 3 above.

SESSION 7 – EXPLORING OUR CONDITIONING.

Brief talk – On the technique of feeling into the components of our sense of self when we meditate. An 8minute talk on the manner in which we feel into our sense of self, the difficulties that can arise and how we can deal with those difficulties when they arise. Recorded on Tuesday the 20th April 2021.

Practice 1 – From where do the judgements we make arise? A 30minute practice in which we carefully and gently reflect on the past events of our lives feeling into the judgements that we are making and feeling how those judgements arise. Recorded on Tuesday the 20th April 2021.

Practice 2 – Reflecting on the sense of self and past events? A 30minute meditation practice – a version of practice 1 – reflecting on the past events of our lives, how that reflection affects the feeling of sense off self and considering where the judgements that we make originate. Recorded on Monday the 25th October 2021.

Practice 3 – Feeling how we define ourselves in relation to the present. A 28minute practice in which we carefully and gently reflect on the roles that we have in our present lives and feel into their origins and meaning for us. This practice ends with a period of self-compassion to remind us that to gain the full benefit from these meditation practices we must be kind and caring to ourselves. Recorded on Tuesday the 20th April 2021.

Practice 4 – Defining ourselves according to our roles in life. A 31minute practice – a version of practice 3 above – reflecting on our roles in life and how they come to define us and create an identity. Finishing with a reminder of the importance of self-compassion in insight meditation practice. Recorded on Monday the 25th October 2021.

At this point in our insight practice we are beginning to feel deeply into our minds and to challenge many of the assumptions that we have lived by and with for most of our lives. It is inevitable that at times strong feelings and emotions will arise and that sometimes we will become conscious of long suppressed memories. To help us deal with these there is a need to practise self-compassion and to have support mechanisms in place should we feel the need to talk things over with other people. You should feel free to contact me using the highlandmindfulness@gmail.com email address if you would like help of any sort, at any time during this course.

SESSION 8 – HOW DOES THE SENSE OF SELF ARISE?

Arriving at the point when we begin to feel the fluidity of the sense of self and realise that it is not fixed or permanent in any way is an important step in our insight practice. Reflecting in meditation on the manner in which the sense of self arises from moment to moment leads to the realisation that much of what we think of as me is constructed by the mind in response to the conditioning events of our life. Whilst this can result in a sense of freedom – “I don’t have to be me anymore” – and other realisations there are much greater insights to come when we begin to look more deeply into the nature of our existence.

Practice 1 – Feeling into the sense of self. A 32minute meditation in which we come to rest in open awareness and are invited to feel into the sense of self noticing as we do so how it feels. Is it solid? Does it vary? Reflecting on how the sense of self feels during our normal activities we ask ourselves when it feels fixed and strong and when it feels soft and open? Recorded on Tuesday the 27th April 2021.

Practice 2 – The fluidity of the sense of self. A 30minute meditation practice designed to help us experience the variability of the sense of self and to begin to see that the variability of the self depends both on external events and our reactions and responses to them. A version of practice 1 above recorded on Monday the 1st November 2021.

Practice 3 – Feeling how our sense of self is constructed moment by moment and realising that we do not need to be bound by our conditioning. A 28minute practice in which we rest and reflect on how our conditioning has created our sense of self and that we do not need to be bound by the idea of who we think we are. Recorded on Tuesday the 27th April 2021.

Practice 4 – The sense of self is constructed by the mind on a moment by moment basis. A 30minute alternative version of practice 3 above that invites us to reflect on the totality of our experience in any moment and to feel how that experience is always changing. Moving on we notice that just as our experience is always changing so our sense of self is constantly varying and that it is being constructed by the mind on a moment by moment basis. Recorded on Monday the 1st November 2021.

The next 3 sessions will be given over to practising these meditations and to consolidating the progress that we have made before we look more deeply into the manner in which we interact with the world and challenge assumptions about the nature of our reality.

PRACTICE MEDITATIONS.

Recording 1 – Challenging our self-critic. A 32minute meditation practice in which we are invited to gently and kindly look at our self-critic and to reflect on how it feels to us and consider from where the values that it uses to judge us have arisen. How difficult does challenging the self-critical side of your nature feel? What if anything is revealed to you as a result of this challenge?

Recording 2 – Practising self-compassion 1. A 33minute self compassion practice – learning to be your own best friend.

Recording 3 – The possessive nature of the self. A 31minute meditation practice in which we examine the nature of possession – of objects and of people – and feel how the sense of possession arises with and from the sense of self.

Recording 4 – Practising self-compassion 2. A 30minute meditation practice in which participants are invited to come to rest in and with their experience by saying Yes to whatever arises.

SESSION 9 – THE TROUBLE WITH SKIN.

This session is all about the sense of separation that we feel between ourselves and other people and between ourselves and the rest of the world including every other living thing. Based on what we have already experienced with regard to our sense of self we can say that our sense of being separate from others is a construct of the mind, derived from our habitual ways of thinking, feeling and acting. The sense of a me inside produces what is known as duality, that is, the experience of an external, objective world outside us. We spend our time identifying with things outside us – money, possessions, career etc – that we think can provide security and happiness. This activity naturally reinforces the sense that there’s a “me” separate from others. The solution to this is to see through the illusion of separation. I am not inside, peering out at an external world but rather I am what the whole world is doing, right here and now. The realisation of non-separation frees me to live in a way that contributes to the well-being of the whole, because I no longer feel apart from that whole. Moreover it enables me to begin to see how duality is at the root of our suffering and how we can gradually progress towards release from that suffering.

Practice 1 – Awareness has no boundaries. A 28minute meditation in which we are invited to come to rest in awareness and then allow awareness to expand outwards through the body, into the space around us and out into world. The questions is asked “Does awareness have any boundaries?” Recorded on Tuesday the 25th May 2021.

Practice 2 – The vast space of awareness. A 31minute meditation – an alternative practice to 1 above – in which we are invited to experience the space of awareness and how everything can be felt arising into and falling away from awareness not as something solid and fixed but as a fleeting impression. Our sense of self can also be felt in this way as not solid and fixed but as an impression that flickers and changes. Recorded on Monday the 8th November 2021.

Practice 3 – Feeling the boundaries of love. A 28minute meditation in which we are invited to experience the feeling of the love that is innate in all of us. As we allow love to be felt and to develop inside us we can begin to feel it flowing and radiating out from us to other people and ultimately to all other living things. The question is “Where are the boundaries between ourselves and others?” Recorded on Tuesday the 25th May 2021.

Practice 4 – Softening the boundaries with loving-kindness. A 30minute meditation – an alternative to 3 above – in which we are invited to make contact with our innate sense of caring, kindness and love and allow it to begin to fill our bodies and minds. As we become filled with loving-kindness we feel its softness, gentleness and openness and we allow it to soften the boundaries between us and others so that our sense of being connected with others is strengthened. Recorded on Monday the 8th November 2021.

SESSION 10 – THE DIFFICULTY WITH EXISTENCE.

When we look at the world in which we live it appears as if everything exists through its own separate nature or essence that makes each thing what it is, including our sense of self. To conceive of people and things existing in and of themselves, through their own core nature is called inherent existence. When we look at ourselves we refer to my mind and my body, as if there exists a separate self somewhere. The self is seen as the owner of the mind and body, which of course are both transitory, whilst the self is viewed as an underlying, unchanging essence or core. However, when we search for such an independent self within or even apart from the mind and body we cannot find anything. Our sense of self is a conceptual construct that we mistakenly believe to have its own intrinsic nature.

Objects of every kind such as apples, cars, people and more subtle things such as thought, feelings and sensations, are conventionally identified or located by characteristics that are relative to other characteristics, such as large is to small, hard is to soft, coarse is to subtle and so on. When we contemplate how an apple comes into being we realise that it does not create itself or exist in itself but rather is dependent on the sun, the rain, the earth in which apple trees grow, the insects that pollinate the flowers and many other things. The existence of apples is dependent on a great many factors and conditions. This dependence on other things is known as dependent arising or co-dependent origination. Everything arises in dependence on everything else and there are no independent, self-existing objects that can be found to exist. There are no self-established things.

Despite intellectual recognition of this and the fact that we know everything changes, we have a deep-seated tendency to assume falsely that people and things have fixed, inborn natures that make them what they are. To see through this delusion is very important because it is the fundamental error that leads to the continual grasping and aversion that underlies all of our suffering. Realising the lack of inherent existence and the nature of dependent arising frees us from the view of being a separate, contained self in a world of separate, contained people and things. It frees us from constant grasping after security and happiness whilst seeking to suppress everything that gives rise to unhappiness, conflict and fear.

Recording – Short talk on inherent existence and dependent arising. 11minutes.

Practice 1 – Resting in the unknown. A 32minute meditation practice in which we open our awareness to the whole of our experience – external and internal senses plus the sense of self – and come to rest as best we can in “basic” consciousness. Recorded on Tuesday the 1st June 2021.

Practice 2 – Opening to our experience with love. A 28minute meditation practice in which we are invited to open to our experience with love, welcoming whatever arises and reminding ourselves of the truth that lies within the “Guest House” poem by Rumi. Recorded on Tuesday the 1st June 2021.

Practice 3 – Resting with the whole of our experience and observing the arising of all phenomena. A 29minute practice in which participants are invited to come to rest and open their awareness to the 5 external senses and to the mind in order to observe the arising of the whole of their experience. The invitation is to consider how everything arises in a manner that is dependent upon everything else. Recorded on Monday the 22nd November 2021.

Practice 4 – Resting in basic awareness (or base consciousness). A 30minute practice in which participants are invited to come to rest at a “deep level” of the mind in which they can observe the arising and falling away of all phenomena – sensations, thoughts, the feeling of self, the processes of the mind – and begin to realise the dependent arising of all phenomena. Recorded on Monday the 22nd November 2021.

SESSION 11 – DUALITY AND CONVENTIONAL REALITY.

As our sense of self grows during childhood we begin to develop another sense that seems to fit neatly into our new found feeling of self – a sense of preference. This seems to be a natural way of making sense of the sensations that we are receiving and viewing as mine by classifying them. The feeling of being hungry which drives us to seek food is compared to the feeling of being well fed or full. Hunger is felt to be unpleasant because it demands some action whilst feeling well fed and full is regarded as being pleasant because with it we feel secure and we relax and fall asleep. Gradually our world which had started as being one of “no-self” and “one taste” becomes not only full of our self and others but also of good and bad, hard and soft, happy and sad and so. In other words we begin to experience the world as full of dualities.

The world of dualities becomes more subtle as we become adults. Pairs of opposites clearly represent a duality but even when we do not clearly define an opposite to some thing, a fundamental duality is made in our minds consciously or sub-consciously, between that thing and what is not that thing. This includes the duality we assume between any thing’s existence and its non-existence and also between its presence and absence. Life in this world, which is can be known as conventional reality, is seen to be of an experience of duality in everything.

Sitting in meditation we can begin to see how the mind engages with, grasps onto and clings to thought. The process of engaging is accompanied by the expression of preference and as the mind clings more tightly the expression of preference which underlies the perception of duality becomes stronger. When we favour one member of a dualistic pair over its opposite the craving formed by clinging and the expression of preference becomes more pronounced and the sense of duality is enhanced. In other words in grasping after one “pole” and pushing away the other the apparent contrast between the two “poles” is highlighted. Without insight this drawing out of the appearance of duality elicits further clinging and perpetuates a vicious cycle in which our internal world can become dominated by extremes and, for instance, the constant search for happiness by suppressing anything regarded as making us unhappy. Happiness and sadness may seem to be real opposites and meditators generally crave happiness and an absence of sadness. With the craving for happiness comes a degree of contraction of the mind around sad feelings and an exaggeration of the differences between happiness and sadness. Similarly grasping at the dualistic notion of security generates a strong perception of insecurity which can lead to fear in what is basically a feedback mechanism of mutual fabrication.

Conventional reality, the real world in which we are living right now, is characterised by duality. As we look deeper into the mind we can begin to see how this duality is created and reinforced. In other words we are beginning to realise how conventional reality arises.

Practice 1 – The “no preference” meditation. A 30minute practice in which participants are invited to settle, to feel the ground beneath them and come to rest before gradually opening up to the whole of their experience. As they rest with their experience the practice moves on the invite them to notice the expression of preference by their minds and how that is linked to the manner in which the mind engages with and clings to thoughts. As the meditation draws to a close the invitation is to begin to let go of preference and see how the mind feels. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 14th October 2012.

Practice 2 – Observing the expression of preference and feeling into “no preference”. A 30minute version of Practice 1 above recorded in the Chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 21st October 2012.

Practice 3 – Seeing duality. A 29minute practice in which, once settled and grounded, participants are invited to observe the mind engaging with and clinging to thoughts and to notice how clinging solidifies thought. As the meditation moves on the invitation is to observe this solidification of thought and begin to see how clinging enhances the sense of duality that is characteristic of conventional reality. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 14th October 2021.

Practice 4 – Clinging and duality. A 30minute versions of Practice 3 above recorded in the Chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 21st October.

SESSION 12 – EMPTINESS.

We suffer in life because we grasp after things believing that they are fixed, substantial, real and capable of being possessed by our self. When we discover that things do not exist the way our grasping self supposes they do, we give ourselves the chance to be free of suffering. When we realise that everything around us is connected, that nothing exists independently and of itself and that everything is an expression of one seamless, ever-changing world, we arrive at what is called the concept of emptiness.

The true meaning of emptiness is often misunderstood. It is not complete nothingness, it doesn’t mean that nothing exists at all and it is not some kind of heaven or separate realm apart from this troubled world. Whilst nothing we experience stands alone and no individual person or thing has any permanent, fixed identity, everything taken together becomes what is sometimes referred to as “interbeing.” This term embraces the true meaning of emptiness with its sense of connection, compassion and love. Another way of expressing this is to say that the realisation of emptiness awakens qualities of mind such as clarity, equanimity, compassion, joy and love that are innate within us. The mere intellectual reading of emptiness fails to appreciate the joyous practical quality of emptiness in spiritual life.

It’s important to differentiate the emptiness experienced through insight meditation with the emotional expression of sadness or depression. In common speech “emptiness” is not a happy word and it is difficult to use it without feeling the underlying sense of loneliness or separateness that it contains. It can be helpful to look for alternatives that express more of the positivity of the realisation of “emptiness” and various words have been suggested, for example, spaciousness, connectedness, suchness. What is definitely not useful is the word “voidness”. The realisation of emptiness is the recognition of something that has the potential for becoming, for the arising of something that has form from that which is formless.

Some people think that a meditative state without thought or activity is the realisation of emptiness. Such a mental state should be treated like all mental states as being temporary and not ultimately conducive to attaining any realisation. Emptiness is, in fact, not a state of mind at all. It is the felt expression of the true nature of all things including the mind. Whether the mind of the meditator is full of thoughts or empty of them, this true nature holds. The reason why we meditate on emptiness is because it is only when we can open our minds to the realisation of the flux and fluidity of the ultimate that is ungraspable and inconceivable that we can relax into clarity, equanimity, joy, love and compassion.

Practice 1 – Progressing towards the recognition of emptiness. A 32minute practice in which we progressively observe our body sensations and our thoughts before feeling into the sense of self and allowing our mind to slowly settle into the recognition of emptiness. Recorded on Tuesday the 8th June 2021.

Practice 2 – Deep resting and moving towards non-duality. A 30minute practice in which participants are invited to rest deeply in open awareness and to gradually let go of thinking, of judging and of the concept of duality leading gradually to an experience of being with whatever is arising just as it is. Recorded on Monday the 6th December 2021.

Practice 3 – Resting in the experience of not knowing. A 25minute practice in which we simply come to rest with a feeling of not knowing. Allowing our minds to be open to whatever arises and letting go of any desire to search for meaning or reach any goal. Recorded on Tuesday the 8th June 2021.

Practice 4 – Resting deeply in the experience of unknowing. A 29minute meditation practice in which participants are invited to use their breath to help them release tension and come to rest deeply and to let go all all desire to analyse, explain or seek meaning. As the mind lets go of concepts the invitation is to rest in the feeling of unknowing. Recorded on Monday the 6th December 2021.

WHO CARES?

When things seem difficult or resistance arises always go back to basics.

Mindfulness is paying attention on purpose, to the present moment, with openness, curiosity and a willingness to be with whatever comes up. The mindful practice of accepting things as they are, in this moment, without judgment, doesn’t mean you agree with the way things are, nor does it imply a lack of motivation for change. Insight practice builds on basic mindfulness meditation by providing us with a framework for personal growth and transformation firmly based on what we learned when we were complete beginners.

Many of the difficulties that arise during insight practice stem from forgetting or ignoring basic mindfulness practices, resisting the need to go back to beginner’s mind and trying to make fast progress. Insight meditation practitioners often seem to want to force change and try to make things change more quickly than the natural arising of wisdom allows. This leads to difficulties in the practice and to what are sometimes referred to as the side effects of meditation. What follows is a description of the difficulties that I have observed in myself and that others have expressed to me: –

• Indifference and nihilism. “If everything is an illusion and if I don’t really exist what does anything matter. I can do what I like when I like.” It’s easy to over stress the illusionary nature of reality and to overinterpret ideas of unreality to the extent that it can seem as if nothing really exists. Not only is this a dangerous exaggeration of insight teachings it is simply not true. If I bang my hand on my desk right now it hurts me physically. If someone behaves rudely and thoughtlessly towards me it hurts me emotionally. This world, which we sometimes refer to as conventional reality, definitely exists because it hurts. What we discover through insight practice is that though this world exists there is the potential for other realities. What we refer to as ultimate reality exists concomitantly with conventional reality. Moreover, as the realisation of the lack of separation develops together with the realisation of our complete dependence on everything else in this reality the natural response is to feel love and deep compassion for all things not to feel isolated and indifferent.
• Depersonalisation. “I don’t know who I am anymore.” Deep meditation on the nature of self and the sense of self as it manifests during daily life can result in a disturbing sense of depersonalisation meaning that all immediate sense of identity is lost. When this occurs in a controlled and supportive meditative environment it can be highly beneficial leading to rapid transformation but when it occurs suddenly and out with the supportive structure of a course or retreat it can be very destructive. All insight practitioners should have the support of a group and an experienced practitioner with whom they can discuss any difficult feelings that arise.
• “The dark night of the soul” – anxiety and depression. “I am useless. All I ever experience is the emptiness and the sadness of my life and when I look into my mind I see nothing but suffering”. This tends to occur when preparations for insight practice have not been thorough. Particularly in people who have a history of mental illness it is extremely important to ensure they have attended at least one beginner’s mindfulness course and have an established personal mindfulness practice. Many of the issues that have been reported to arise during insight practice have occurred in people who have little or no experience of mindfulness and have been persuaded to try insight practice with no preparation or previous experience.
• Arrogance – “I am an advanced practitioner and I operate at a level of consciousness that is above everyone else’s and I understand what reality is.” It’s not uncommon for practitioners to get caught up in their “ego” and to believe that they have reached a state of enlightenment and then to tell everyone else all about it. What happens is that our sense of self is extremely subtle and as one teacher told me “You don’t really expect your mind to give up all of its defence mechanisms, its conditioning and its habitual patterns of thought that have been built up over 50+ years in a couple of days do you?”. Insight is developed over many years, strong feelings of the sense of self take time to weaken and dissipate and what gradually replaces them is a sense of humility. One of the main characteristics of a dedicated insight practitioner is humility because they realise how much they don’t know. Let go of the tendency to compare yourself with and judge others and understand that wisdom is innate in everyone.

In order to avoid difficulties arising during your insight practice always maintain as best you can the characteristics of beginner’s mind – curiosity and interest in what is arising with a sense of open mindedness and joy in being able to practice. Return to basic mindfulness practices on a regular basis and ensure that you have an experienced insight practitioner or a group of fellow practitioners to whom you can talk if you run into problems.

“Who cares” talk. 20minute talk from which the above summary is taken.

Practice 1 – Progressing towards a sense of openness in meditation. A 30minute meditation in which we settle and ground ourselves and then gradually allow body and mind to come to rest in an open and receptive manner – allowing everything that arises in our experience to be seen and felt. Recorded on Tuesday the 15th June 2021.

Practice 2 – Releasing our assumptions and opening the mind. A 26minute meditation in which we use the breath to initiate the process of releasing all the assumptions and preconceptions that we have about ourselves and letting go of the concepts that we use to describe our world. As our minds open afresh we can begin to allow what is innate within us to arise and be experienced. Recorded on Tuesday the 15th June 2021.

DEEPENING MINDFULNESS – INTERMEDIATE COURSE.

SESSION 1 – RETURNING TO THE SENSE OF SELF (current course 17th January 2022).

In sessions 5-8 of the introductory course above we looked at the sense of self in a generalised way concentrating on the feeling of a sense of presence or feeling of self. In seeking to deepen our practice there is a need to look at the sense of self in much greater detail concentrating more on the individual building blocks of self. This allows for a much more thorough “demolition” job or to put it more gently, a full and detailed structural survey. Doing this will not only help us to realise the processes of construction of the self but also give us deeper insights into our conditioning. So we are starting these deepening insight sessions by returning to the sense of self and taking a little more time to explore it more throughly. If we don’t realise the sense of self fully before we explore the mind further everything that arises will be seen to be distorted through the “lens of self”.

Practice 1 – Feeling into the nature of the sense of self. A 30minute practice recorded in the Chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 16th September 2021. In this meditation we are invited to settle and ground ourselves and come to rest before gently exploring the sense of self to see what its components are.

Practice 2 – Softening the sense of self with compassion. A 28minute meditation recorded in the Chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 16th September 2021. In this meditation we are invited to look at the judgements and comparisons that we make particularly with regard to ourselves and others and to open to these with self-compassion.

Practice 3 – Feeling into the nature of the sense of self. An alternative 30minute meditation to practice 1 above but recorded with the online group in the evening of Thursday the 16th September 2021.

Practice 4 – Softening the sense of self with compassion. An alternative 29minute meditation to practice 2 above recorded with the online group in the evening of Thursday the 16th September 2021.

Exercise – What does the sense of self consist of and how does it arise? Contemplate the various possible components of the sense of self looking at, for instance, the identities that we assume in relation to our roles in society including our jobs, our hobbies and groups of which we may be a part. Consider the processes that are involved in producing and reinforcing these identities looking, for instance, at the judgements and comparisons that we make with others, the conditioning to which we may have been exposed, our body image and so on. Reflect on how this may determine our view of ourselves – who do we think that we are and what sort of person do I think I am – and what we feel is our place in society? Ask yourself how your sense of self arises from moment to moment and how the feelings that you have about yourself come into being? Who or what defines who you are? On what basis do you make judgements about yourself?

Please be aware that this exercise is primarily a feeling exercise that should involve meditating on the questions that have been posed. It’s important to see through meditation practice how you feel about the roles that you play in your life and then to allow the feelings to feed through into intellectual thought. Your feelings will guide you to find what is most important and lead you to a realisation of the emotional processing that is taking place in the mind from which intellectual understanding can arise.

SESSION 2 – CONSTRUCTING AND DECONSTRUCTING THE SELF (current course 24th January 2022).

Practice 1 – Directing love towards all phenomena. A 22minute meditation practice recorded on the morning of Thursday the 23rd September 2021 in which participants are invited to come to rest and open awareness to all of their senses and to welcome all of their experience. Whether the experience is felt to be pleasant or unpleasant, whether there is resistance or complete acceptance, the practice is to extend loving kindness to all experienced phenomena. Towards the end of the practice participants are invited to become aware of their self-sense or self-image and to direct loving kindness to this also.

Practice 2 – Directing love towards all phenomena. A second and longer version of the above meditation lasting 25minutes and recorded in the evening of Thursday the 23rd September.

Practice 3 – The inherent existence of the sense of self. A 22minute practice recorded on the morning of Thursday the 23rd September 2021 in which participants are invited to bring to mind an embarrassing or otherwise difficult event and to feel the effect that the thoughts and feelings around it has on the sense of self. They are then asked to explore the strength and apparent solidity of the sense of self that is generated and to realise how permanent it feels.

Practice 4 – The inherent existence of the sense of self. A second version of the above lasting 29minutes and recorded in the evening of Thursday the 23rd September 2021.

Exercise – Observing the sense of self moment by moment. During the coming week when ever you can bring awareness to your daily activities observing what is happening as it is happening moment by moment. Pay attention in particular to the feeling of the sense of self, noticing when it feels strong and what events have given rise to that sense of strength and solidity. Noticing also when it feels diffuse and weak and being aware of the events that seemed to have given rise to a sense of weakness and fluidity. Allow yourself to become aware of how the sense of self seems to arise or be constructed moment by moment and see if you can realise the processes involved.

SESSION 3 – THE IMPOSSIBLE SELF (current course 31st January 2022).

In this session we consider the existence of the self and look to see if it exists inherently using the first 2 reasonings from the 7fold reasoning process (please see the separate article on this website entitled “Inherent Existence”). Coming to the conclusion that the self must be a construct of the mind we then contemplate the processes that could lead to the formation of the self.

Practice 1 – Looking for the self – the 2 fold reasoning. A 31minute meditation practice focussing on the first 2 (which are the most significant and on which the other 5 rely) of the 7 fold reasonings. In this meditation we search for the self in the body and the mind and consider whether it might exist independently of them. Since the self cannot be found we each the conclusion that it cannot inherently exist and must in some way be a construct of the mind. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 30th September 2021.

Practice 2 – Searching for the self and the 2 fold reasoning. A32minute practice recorded in the Chapel on the morning of Thursday the 7th October 2021. Basically the same meditation as above but recorded with a face to face group.

Practice 3 – Constructing the self. In this 25minute practice we focus our awareness on specific sensations to enable us to feel how a sensation is felt in the mind and received by the self. We look at how the mind imputes the self as a receiver of sensation and how the foundations of self lie in the external senses. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 30th September 2021.

Practice 4 – The arising of self. A 28minute meditation practice recorded in the Chapel on the morning of Thursday the 7th October 2021. Participants are invited to feel how the sense of self arises as we develop after being born and to feel how the mind imputes a sense of self to receive sensations from our external senses.

How the self comes into being.

Imagine that you are a foetus in the womb. Your whole life is your mother. Your food, your warmth, your security comes from her. In fact, it is her as at this point in your existence you are part of her. There is no sense of separation from her and hence no need for a self.

Then you are born and suddenly you are subject to sensations that you have never experienced before. Warmth, coolness, the touch of blankets on your skin, maybe a moment of pain as a pinprick is made to obtain a drop of blood, and then hunger as for the first time your stomach feels empty. All of these sensations come into awareness and are felt in the mind. Where do the come from and who it is that is feeling them? In order to make sense of this sudden surge of new experiences the mind imputes a sense of self. These are my experiences, that pinprick of pain is coming from my heel, that sensation of hunger is from my stomach and it does not feel good. The foundations of the sense of self are being constructed and as you develop from a baby into a toddler and through childhood layer upon layer of sensations, feelings and the influences of social and cultural conditioning add more and more building blocks to the self. By the time you are an adult a huge edifice or fortress of self in the mind has been built which is who you feel you are. Sometimes this edifice seems softer and less well defined than others, sometimes it seems to change slightly but it is always there in form or another. In this session and the ones that follow we are looking at the processes of construction of this self and beginning to contemplate what we will experience when we finally obtain the emotional realisation that the self is a construct of the mind.

Exercise 1 – Familiarise yourself with the first 2 reasonings of the 7fold reasoning process and meditate on the fact that an inherently existing self cannot be found anywhere and therefore cannot exist in and of itself. Once you feel confident in that conclusion contemplate the possibility that the self must be a construct of the mind and that it is constantly being shaped and reshaped by the events of your life as every moment passes.

Exercise 2 – The foundations of the sense of self. Meditate on the sensations of the body by choosing a specific sensation – one that you may generate by, for instance, pressing a thumb into the arch of one of your feet or one that may be particularly prominent at the time that you sit down to practise – and gently feel into the process by which the sensation is received in the mind. Reflect that the sensation is being received and owned by the self and that if there weren’t a self to receive it what would happen to it?

SESSION 4 – MOVING BEYOND THE SELF. (Current course 7th February 2022).

Even though we may feel that we are already able to experience a feeling of “no-self” and that we are making good progress in our meditation the truth is that it takes time and much practice to begin to move significantly beyond the self. This should not surprise us since our sense of self has been constructed over many years, constantly being reinforced by our conditioning and the manner in which we have become used to interpreting the events of the world around us, and has in fact become not just a habit but a way of life. The mind is not going to let go of its old ways of viewing the world easily. The process of retraining or of allowing the mind to release its old ways of thinking and feeling will take considerable time. As a consequence at our stage of meditation training anything that we might contemplate will be viewed to a considerable extent though the lens of the self, that is, seen through and distorted by our preferences. The mind will grasp onto inviting concepts such as “ultimate truth”, “sacred awareness” and “universal consciousness” and generally throw up illusions to convince us that we have arrived at the “ultimate” whereas in fact we are still very much caught up in the self. It is much easier for the mind and for our sense of self to try and maintain some semblance of the status quo rather than continually challenging our assumptions and seeking to look more deeply into the mind. The process of looking beyond the self is made even more difficult by the fact that there are now many directions in which we can seek to direct our meditative enquiry and it is possible to become confused and even lost in the myriad of ways that now appear before us. In this session we take a short break and examine awareness and perception to see whether what arises will help to show us the most useful direction to go in our practice.

Practice 1 – The vastness of awareness and the sense of separation. A 29minute meditation practice in which participants are invited to settle and to begin to feel what seems to be the immeasurable space of awareness. As the practice moves on the invitation is to feel sensations, thoughts and feelings, that is all phenomena including even the sense of self, rising into awareness and then fading away as if they are merging from and melting back into awareness itself. The question is asked “Is it possible to see all phenomena as having the same feel or substance as awareness?” Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 7th October 2021.

Practice 2 – The vastness of awareness. A 30minute version of Practice 1 (as above) recorded with the face to face group in the chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 14th October 2021.

Practice 3 – Perception and fact. A 29minute meditation practice in which participants are invited to settle and ground themselves and gently come to rest in awareness of the whole of their experience. The invitation is then to narrow the focus onto one aspect of that experience such as sound and to reflect on the processes of perception working on that aspect of experience to give it meaning, to name it and if necessary to explain it. The questions is then asked “Is what we finally receive in our minds as a result of our perceptual processes a fact?” We are invited to liken this to the session in our beginner’s mindfulness course entitled “Thoughts are not facts”. Maybe perceptions are also not facts. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 7th October 2021.

Practice 4 – Perceptions are not facts. A 30minute version of Practice 3 (as above) recorded with the face to face group in the chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 14th October 2021.

Exercise – choose any of the meditations that you have practised so far in your journey into the mind and listen to them again seeing if anything new arises for you. As you do so remember the often repeated instructions “Always be prepared to return to basic mindfulness practices (especially if things appear to be becoming more difficult and complicated)” and “Adopt a beginner’s mind (open to the practice as if you had never encountered it before)”.

SESSION 5 – DUALITY AND CONVENTIONAL REALITY. (Current course 14th February 2022).

As our sense of self grows during childhood we begin to develop another sense that seems to fit neatly into our new found feeling of self – a sense of preference. This seems to be a natural way of making sense of the sensations that we are receiving and viewing as mine by classifying them. The feeling of being hungry which drives us to seek food is compared to the feeling of being well fed or full. Hunger is felt to be unpleasant because it demands some action whilst feeling well fed and full is regarded as being pleasant because with it we feel secure and we relax and fall asleep. Gradually our world which had started as being one of “no-self” and “one taste” becomes not only full of our self and others but also of good and bad, hard and soft, happy and sad and so. In other words we begin to experience the world as full of dualities.

The world of dualities becomes more subtle as we become adults. Pairs of opposites clearly represent a duality but even when we do not clearly define an opposite to some thing, a fundamental duality is made in our minds consciously or sub-consciously, between that thing and what is not that thing. This includes the duality we assume between any thing’s existence and its non-existence and also between its presence and absence. Life in this world, which is can be known as conventional reality, is seen to be of an experience of duality in everything.

Sitting in meditation we can begin to see how the mind engages with, grasps onto and clings to thought. The process of engaging is accompanied by the expression of preference and as the mind clings more tightly the expression of preference which underlies the perception of duality becomes stronger. When we favour one member of a dualistic pair over its opposite the craving formed by clinging and the expression of preference becomes more pronounced and the sense of duality is enhanced. In other words in grasping after one “pole” and pushing away the other the apparent contrast between the two “poles” is highlighted. Without insight this drawing out of the appearance of duality elicits further clinging and perpetuates a vicious cycle in which our internal world can become dominated by extremes and, for instance, the constant search for happiness by suppressing anything regarded as making us unhappy. Happiness and sadness may seem to be real opposites and meditators generally crave happiness and an absence of sadness. With the craving for happiness comes a degree of contraction of the mind around sad feelings and an exaggeration of the differences between happiness and sadness. Similarly grasping at the dualistic notion of security generates a strong perception of insecurity which can lead to fear in what is basically a feedback mechanism of mutual fabrication.

Conventional reality, the real world in which we are living right now, is characterised by duality. As we look deeper into the mind we can begin to see how this duality is created and reinforced. In other words we are beginning to realise how conventional reality arises.

Practice 1 – The “no preference” meditation. A 30minute practice in which participants are invited to settle, to feel the ground beneath them and come to rest before gradually opening up to the whole of their experience. As they rest with their experience the practice moves on the invite them to notice the expression of preference by their minds and how that is linked to the manner in which the mind engages with and clings to thoughts. As the meditation draws to a close the invitation is to begin to let go of preference and see how the mind feels. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 14th October 2012.

Practice 2 – Observing the expression of preference and feeling into “no preference”. A 30minute version of Practice 1 above recorded in the Chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 21st October 2012.

Practice 3 – Seeing duality. A 29minute practice in which, once settled and grounded, participants are invited to observe the mind engaging with and clinging to thoughts and to notice how clinging solidifies thought. As the meditation moves on the invitation is to observe this solidification of thought and begin to see how clinging enhances the sense of duality that is characteristic of conventional reality. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 14th October 2021.

Practice 4 – Clinging and duality. A 30minute versions of Practice 3 above recorded in the Chapel of the RNI on the morning of Thursday the 21st October.

SESSION 6 – USING SELF-COMPASSION TO DEVELOP INSIGHT. (Current course 21st February 2022).

As we progress deeper into the mind with our insight practice two difficulties can arise. The first is that the intensity of the experience can lead the mind to retreat to the familiar practice of intellectualising. In other words we can start thinking about the experience that we are having during meditation and instead of feeling our way through the process we return to old habits of seeking intellectual meaning. Naturally this leads us to become entangled in analysis, association and explanation – the conceptual proliferation that we found ourselves caught up in at the start of our meditative journey.

The second is that because insight practice enables us to look into our minds we inevitably uncover our suffering often experiencing suffering that we had suppressed many years ago or that we weren’t even aware was there. The experience of suffering arising in our minds generates not only discomfort and triggers avoidance, such as intellectualisation as described above, but also insecurity and fear. Uncontrolled exposure to suffering through intense insight practice can be very destructive for practitioners and lead to feelings of indifference and nihilism.

The strategy for helping us to cope with whatever arises during insight practice involves being kind and caring towards ourselves, being loving and practising loving-kindness and in cultivating self-compassion. These terms are often used synonymously in meditation practice – it’s quite usual to hear facilitators guiding practices that mention all of the terms in the same breath – but they do, in fact, have different practical significance for insight meditators. Being kind and caring towards ourselves is like giving ourselves a big warm hug. Kindness and caring are soothing terms designed to help us relax in the face of difficulties and be more aware of how we feel without becoming too involved with whatever feelings are arising. The words imply a sense of standing back and observing just as we tend to do in our daily lives when we being kind and caring towards others. Loving and loving-kindness are stronger versions of the big warm hug designed to help us embrace our self-critical nature and be more accepting of who we are and what we are feeling. Self-compassion in contrast implies a direct, full on acknowledgement of suffering and the willingness to feel it in all its intensity. It not only insists that we be with our suffering but that we fully engage with it, breathing it in and experiencing its full effects.

In this session we will explore the interaction between insight practice, kindness and caring practice including loving kindness, and self-compassion through 2 meditations – loving ourselves and taking and sending for ourselves (tonglen).

Practice 1 – Being kind to our minds. A 30minute practice in which participants are invited to settle and come to rest before opening to whatever is being experienced. The invitation is to adopt an attitude of kindness and caring towards the processes of the mind including judgement and the expression of preference. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 21st October 2021.

Practice 2 – Taking and sending. A 26minute practice in which participants are invited to connect with their innate sense of love and compassion around their heart and breathing in and out of that space. The first step is to take in the suffering of someone that we know, greet it with love and compassion, and then breathe our relief and the ardent desire that they be relieved from their suffering. Following taking in the suffering of others the invitation is to open to our own suffering, to breathe it in to the heart and to release it on the outbreath. Recorded in the evening of Thursday the 21st October 2021.

CONSOLIDATION SESSION 1 – 28th February 2022.

Practice 1 – Deep relaxation and the spaciousness of awareness. A 33minute meditation practice time in which we open into our awareness to experience not only the deep relaxation of “floating” in awareness but also the vast spaciousness of awareness.

Practice 2 – Deep compassion for all phenomena. A 31minute meditation in which we use the sense of relaxing into the spaciousness of awareness to allow us to view everything that is arising for us (the totality of our experience) with a kind and caring attitude that sees all things as phenomena – that is without any sense of ownership.

CONSOLIDATION SESSION 2 – 7th March 2022.

Practice 1 – Clinging and impermanence. A 35minute meditation practice in which we observe the mind as it clings to whatever is arising within it that it feels is significant. We acknowledge that clinging tends to make everything feel solid and permanent whereas in fact everything is insubstantial and impermanent.

Practice 2 – Exchanging self and others. A 35minute compassion practice in which we share our joys and pleasures and take in our difficulties recognising that in doing so the sense of separation between ourselves and others begins to dissolve.

DEEPENING INSIGHT – MORE ADVANCED PRACTICE

PRACTICE LEVEL 1 – APPROACHING EMPTINESS.

In Session 12 of the introductory course (see above) we looked briefly at the concept of emptiness. As we deepen our insight meditation practice there is a need to approach this topic in much greater detail beginning with our experience of the sense of our self.

Many practitioners experience emptiness for the first time after extensive meditation on the sense of self. The full realisation that self is a construct of the mind tends to lead to an internal dialogue that may include the following: –
“If the person that I thought I was is a construct of the mind then who am I? And if everything that surrounds me is in some way an expression of the processes of my mind what is reality? Is nothing real? What remains if we have discounted the sense of self and come to the conclusion that everything that I experience is in some way a construct of my mind?”
The first glimpse of emptiness is an individual one and it can be profoundly changing and sometimes shocking. There is benefit in approaching the concept slowly and gently with a degree of self-compassion and doing so in carefully considered meditative steps.

The first of these is to look carefully at the concept of the sense of self. Without a thorough realisation of the sense of self as a construct of the mind any view of deeper meditative experiences will always be viewed as in some way an expression of self. In other words, everything will be seen through the lens of self through which it will be distorted and only partly visible. For instance, the commonly expressed view that a meditative state without thought or activity is the realisation of emptiness is a misinterpretation of meditative experience that can result from viewing the mind through the self. Such calm and very peaceful mental states should be treated like all mental states as being temporary and not ultimately conducive to attaining any realisation of emptiness. One way of going deeply into the sense of self, which we will be using in this session, is to examine in detail in our meditation practice the processes of making judgements, including looking at the ego-centred preference system. We may find that there are many levels of judgements from the gross or superficial everyday decisions that we make, like whether it is safe to cross the road or not, right down to very subtle judgements relating to our thoughts and the nature of our reality.

As we do so please remember that emptiness is, in fact, not a state of mind at all. It is the felt expression of the true nature of all things including the mind. Whether the mind of the meditator is full of thoughts or empty of them, this true nature holds. The reason why we meditate on emptiness is because it is only when we can open our minds to the realisation of the flux and fluidity of the ultimate that is ungraspable and inconceivable that we can relax into clarity, equanimity, joy, love and compassion.

Practice 1 – Deep relaxation of body and mind. A 40minute meditation practice in which we take time to allow the body and mind to enter a deep sense of rest in which awareness becomes very spacious and the mind opens. As we come to rest we see if we can let go of any sense of self and relate to our experience without labelling or judgement of any sort (recorded with the online group on Thursday the 13th January 2022).

Practice 2 – Coming to yourself. A 31minute meditation practice in which allow ourselves to settle and come to rest before visualising a very beautiful, secure and safe place in which we can rest. We become aware of another presence, a troubled and suffering presence, that is moving towards us in our beautiful space and realise that it is another aspect of ourselves. We welcome our troubled and suffering self into our space acknowledging our own suffering and recognising that we can find relief from that suffering (recorded with the online group on Thursday the 13th January 2022).

Practice 3 – Levels of judgement. A 40minute practice (recorded with the face to face group in Ness Church on Friday the 21st January 2022) in which participants are invited to settle and come into a deep resting state in which they can observe their experience and feel the process of the mind passing judgement.

Short talk on levels of judgement and the process of looking deeply into the mind in insight practice – a 10minute talk on judgement and how through insight practice we can begin to experience what is beyond judgement (recorded on Friday the 21st January 2022).

Practice 4 – Viewing our experience and the judgement of that experience with self-compassion. A 35minute meditation practice in which participants are once again invited to enter a state of deep rest, open their minds and observe their experience including the judgements that they are making – and to view everything that arises with compassion (recorded with the face to face group in the Ness Church on Friday the 21st January 2022).

Practice 5 – The last vestiges of self. A 40minute meditation in which participants are invited to feel deeply into their sense of self and contemplate the subtle manner in which the self asserts and reasserts itself even as we practise to release it. Recorded with the online group on Thursday the 27th January 2022).

Practice 6 – A second version of the last vestiges of self recorded with the face to face group in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 28th January 2022.

Practice 7 – Relaxing into not knowing. A 35minute practice, recorded with the online group on Thursday the 27th January 2022, in which participants are invited to gradually recognise and acknowledge whatever sense self is present and release into a sense of not knowing. The implication of this meditation practice is that moving towards the experience of emptiness requires the practitioner to let go of any desire to analyse or explain their experience in terms of conventional concepts.

Short talk on the process of realising emptiness and the meaning of this journey into our minds. An 8minute talk on the relationship between conventional and ultimate reality and how the experience of this journey into our minds relates to and changes our daily lives.

PRACTICE LEVEL 2 – THE EXPERIENCE OF EMPTINESS, LETTING GO OF CONCEPTS AND THE DIAMOND MIND – DOES THIS MOMENT EXIST?

During our meditation practice we often refer to moments of time. Another way of expressing this is to say that central to our perception of time is the notion that there are portions of time that are existing or happening now and others that are not. Those that are not happening now fall into 2 groups – the past, which is gone and the future which is yet to come. Time means past, present, future, beginning, middle and end whether or not we use words like moment to describe it. We seem to have a deep way of perceiving time as being real and of inherently existing. Moreover the concept of a moment in time seems fundamental to our practice as we are guided to observe our experience as it changes from moment to moment or as we are invited to rest in the moment. Settling our mind and body during insight practice we begin to see how much the sense of past and the future is constructed by thought and how much suffering is wrapped up in ruminating about our past and our future. Resting in the present becomes to feel more natural and can feel very liberating and joyful. Ideas of the past and the future can drop away at times leaving only the reality of the present.

Although this can be a very helpful way of looking there is a danger of reifying “the now” such that “being in the now” becomes the goal of practice. It is as if “this moment” or “the now” inherently exists for us to find and revel in during our meditation practice. To help us escape from becoming entangled in belief in “the moment” there are 2 arguments that we can use: –

1. The neither-one-nor-many reasoning – if this moment has inherent existence it has to be one (a single, indivisible whole) or many (formed of many parts). It is either divided into a beginning, middle and an end or it is not. Without any differentiation between beginning and end it would be impossible to arrange moments in order of time or of happening but if it is divisible then it is not one but 3 moments. The beginning must come before the middle and the end so the moment with which we started is no longer one moment but actually 3 different moments in time. If the moment cannot be divided it must be infinitely small and being without a beginning or an end it would be impossible to arrange in order of time. So a moment that is truly one is not possible. Given that many is only possible as an accumulation of ones the idea that the present moment can inherently exist is untenable.
2. Diamond slivers reasoning – so called because the sharpness of a diamond edge can cut through anything. Here we use the sharpness of logic to demonstrate that a moment of time as we commonly use the term is a concept and cannot inherently exist. How does a moment off time arise? It cannot arise from itself because arising is meaningless for something that already exists and to exist before it arises is quite obviously impossible. If it arises from something else that something would either have to be another force, factor or energy in the present moment or in any past moment. It cannot arise from something else in the present moment because, being in the same moment, that would be a case of a moment arising from itself, which we have said above is meaningless. It cannot arise from a past moment either because any past moment must have completely disappeared before the present moment can arise. Being totally gone how could a past moment give rise to anything. To consider that a moment arises neither from itself nor from anything else would be to say that moments arise without any cause or conditions whereas this moment as we experience it clearly depends on the other moments before it.

Considering all of the options the conclusion must be that what we consider to be a moment in time cannot exist of itself independently of all other things. In other words it does not exist inherently. It is a concept that we use to make sense of the conventional reality in which we live but one, like many other concepts on which we base our world, is empty of meaning.

Short talk – Leaving concepts behind and adjusting to the experience of a realm of feeling. A talk of about 8minutes in length in which we look back at the manner in which we have used concepts to help us learn during our meditation practice up until now. Realising that from now on concepts and conceptual thought processes have to be left behind as we venture into a realm of feeling. Recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 4th February 2022.

Practice 1 – Moving beyond concepts. A 34minute meditation in which we spend 15minutes thoroughly settling, grounding ourselves and coming to rest before allowing ourselves to move down through “levels” of the mind. Recognising the intellectual mind and conceptual proliferation to begin with, then seeing the sense of self as it fluctuates from moment to moment and finally allowing a sense of being without time to arise. Resting in that feeling of being for a few minutes before gradually releasing and coming back through the “levels” to complete the practice.

Practice 2 – Touching emptiness. A 40minute meditation practice in which we settle and ground ourselves and come to rest in a state of open awareness that allows us to feel the impermanence of all experience (phenomena). From here we gradually open to the feeling of space or emptiness that lies beyond conceptual thought and the sense of self and allow ourselves to rest with or in that space. Recorded with the online group on Thursday the 3rd February 2022.

Practice 3 – Resting in not knowing. A 40minute practice in which we settle and ground ourselves thoroughly, entering into a state of deep rest. After observing the totality of our experience for some time we feel once again into emptiness and practise resting in a state of not knowing. Recorded with the online group on Thursday the 3rd February 2022.

At this point in our insight practice there is a need to return to examine and meditate upon the tendency of the mind to cling to thoughts, memories, ideas and concepts that in some way provide a feeling of solidity and permanence. This is clearly of particular importance as we seek to experience emptiness because the mind will naturally tend to cling to what is familiar and judged to be safe rather than allow us to open into the potential insecurity of emptiness. Recognising and letting go of the tendency to cling allows us to deepen our realisation of emptiness and begin to experience the deeper emotional understanding of reality therein.

Practice 4 – Judgement, clinging and emptiness 1. A 40minute meditation in which, after settling, grounding and resting, we observe the activity of the mind as it makes judgements and expresses preference and realise how this leads to clinging and a sense of solidity and permanence that is illusionary. As we then allow ourselves to let go of clinging and judgement we find ourselves beginning to experience emptiness as the mind opens and comes to rest with a sense of oneness (non-duality). Recorded online on Thursday the 10th February 2022.

Practice 5 – Judgement, clinging and emptiness 2. A second version of Practice 4 recorded in the Ness bank Church on Friday the 11th February 2022.

Where are we now – Duality and oneness (non-duality) – a short talk (8mins) summarising this session and describing the process on which we are engaged in this section part of level 2 practice.

Practice 6 – Joining the dots and minding the gap 1. A 35minute meditation practice in which we contemplate the process by which the mind fabricates our reality. Firstly, we pay attention to the gaps between sounds, then within physical sensations and emotions/feelings and lastly, between thoughts. We consider how the mind tends to ignore the gaps and stitch together a narrative based on what it believes is important. As we allow ourselves to relax into the gaps we again begin to experience emptiness and sense of oneness. Recorded online on Thursday the 10th February 2022.

Practice 7 – Joining the dots and minding the gap 2. A second version of 6 recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 11th February 2022.

PRACTICE LEVEL 3 – EQUANIMITY, COMPASSION AND WISDOM. Beginning to experience the innate qualities of mind.

The news never seems to be good these days and it can sometimes seem as if we are surrounded by suffering. Some religions take the view that human beings are born bad and that we need to force ourselves to repent and change our negative thinking and harmful behaviours. What we discover through using meditation on our spiritual journey is that the negativity that obscures our true nature is impermanent and temporary and that we all have the potential to become awakened beings.

According to the dualistic reality in which we live we must strive to transform evil into good, opposing greed, anger, and ignorance with generosity, kindness, and clarity. In the nondual view that arises through meditation we find ourselves embracing everything that arises, good and bad, right and wrong, as examples of our awakened nature. Some would say that this awakened nature, which is innate within us, actually fills the universe.

All suffering is based on duality: me and you, happiness and sadness, good and bad, right and wrong. In our normal daily lives we go back and forth endlessly in dualities and our minds see only opposites. From the nondual perspective such minds are distorted and unable to comprehend the reality of an all pervasive, awakened nature.

Our innate, awakened nature is neither good nor bad. It has the characteristics of equanimity, compassion and clarity and promises relief from the mind that creates division and clings stubbornly to a separate self. The negativity that plagues human life and society can be seen as a temporary clouding of our essential, awakened nature not a permanent part of who we are. Just as the sun is always shining but is often hidden from our view by the clouds in the sky, we can say that ignorance and negativity hide the reality of our awakened mind from our conscious awareness.

There are many ways of looking at our innate, nondual, awakened nature. We can describe it as our essential nature, unborn, free from clinging, and free from self. It is always present and it cannot be opposed or attained. It can’t be understood by the discursive mind. In the undivided, nondual reality that holds all opposites, every experience reveals the truth of awakening. For the mind that endlessly creates dualistic thoughts and views, this is hard to understand but once it is seen, it is profoundly changing.

Although awakened nature sounds special, it is actually profoundly ordinary and it is not something we have to create. It appears naturally from the ground of our being when we learn to experience who are we without accepting, rejecting, or judging anything. It arises when we come to rest but while simple, it’s not easy, because our usual way of being is based so strongly on the dualism and distortion of self and on our addiction to striving. Resting in meditation we learn to watch all the arisings in the body and the mind and see them for what they are: temporary phenomena, taking shape as thoughts, feelings, perceptions, opinions, and sensations. All we have to do to recognise our awakened nature is sit down, be still and stay awake to whatever is present. Whenever anything arises in awareness, whether it’s a thought, a feeling, or a perception, we don’t cling onto it, fight it or try to change it.

The Tibetan teacher Dzogchen Ponlop Rinpoche described our essential nature this way:
“… our fundamental nature of mind is a luminous expanse of awareness that is beyond all conceptual fabrication and completely free from the movement of thoughts. It is the union of emptiness and clarity, of space and radiant awareness that is endowed with supreme and immeasurable qualities. From this basic nature of emptiness everything is expressed; from this everything arises and manifests.”

Practice 1 – Equanimity and wisdom 1. A 38minute meditation recorded on Thursday the 17th February 2022.

Practice 2 – Equanimity and wisdom 2. A 40minute version of 1 above recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 18th February 2022.

Practice 3 – Equanimity, wisdom and compassion. A 40minute meditation recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 18th February 2022.

Short talk on the quality of equanimity and the arising of wisdom. An 8minute talk recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 18th February 2022.

Practice 1 – The basic practices are also the most profound – Sitting and breathing with impermanence 1. A 35minute meditation practice recorded on Thursday the 24th February 2022.

Practice 2 – The basic practices are also the most profound – Sitting and breathing with impermanence 2. A further version of 1 above recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 25th February 2022.

Practice 3 – Compassion arises spontaneously in the spaciousness of awareness 1. A 35minute meditation practice recorded on Thursday the 24th February 2022.

Practice 4 – Compassion arises spontaneously in the spaciousness of awareness 2. A 40minute practice recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 25th February 2022 as a further version of 3 above.

BEGINNING TO EXPERIENCE THE UNCONTRIVED.

A state of mind not mentally constructed by conceptual thought.

In our meditation practice contriving means trying to make something happen. This can be deliberate as when we are seeking to cultivate and develop a particular quality of mind, such as compassion, but all too often it happens when we’re trying a bit too hard to realise some perceived goal. We end up being a bit too forceful and the mind and often the body become tense. Over time we can create a feedback loop where we get frustrated at not being able to achieve what we feel we ought to in our practice and this brings about more tension and ‘trying’. We should be clear, however, that contriving, particularly in the early stages of learning meditation techniques, can be a part of wholesome mindfulness practice in which we gently and persistently set up the conditions for mindfulness to come into being in a more natural way. In this sense ‘contriving’ relates to encouraging and cultivating mindfulness. We strengthen our intention to be aware through reminding ourselves, in the present moment, and through remembering to be aware.

As we gain more experience of meditation and our practice begins to deepen we naturally move into states of uncontrived mindfulness in which it can be said that awareness arises spontaneously with a sense of flow and ease. The mind becomes naturally aware and knows what is happening. There is no need for personal effort as the qualities of mindfulness and clear seeing have become strong in the mind. At this point we can lose the feeling that there is someone solid and whole who is doing the practice. In other words, we lose the sense of self. In its place arises a felt understanding that there isn’t anyone thinking, directing, or controlling experience. This understanding includes the sense that everything including awareness is simply arising on its own terms. This is why we are now beginning to talk of uncontrived equanimity and uncontrived compassion in our practice – these qualities of mind arise spontaneously when we rest in a deep meditation.

One important aspect of this that we should note is that in order to “rest in the uncontrived” we need to be able to recognise the sense of self and to release our involvement with it. If we attempt to meditate at a deep level without having thoroughly explored and become acquainted with the sense of self we will encounter resistance and even a sense of there being a barrier to our progress. We must remember that the sense of self is contrived, that is constructed by the mind, and hence we will not be able to experience the uncontrived whilst we are still caught up in the sense of self.

Practice 1 – Exchanging self and other 1. A practical exploration of self, other and the lack of separation to illustrate the meaning of what is contrived and what is uncontrived. A 35minute meditation recorded on Thursday the 3rd February 2022.

Practice 2 – The quality of awareness 1. A 30minute meditation recorded on Thursday the 3rd February 2022 exploring the nature and quality of awareness. Is awareness contrived or uncontrived?

Practice 3 – Exchanging self and other 2. A 38minute version of 1 above recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 4th February 2022.

Practice 4 – The quality of awareness 2. A 35minute version of 2 above recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 4th February 2022.

PRACTICE LEVEL 4 – EXPLORING THE FUNDEMENTAL QUALITIES 0F EMPTINESS.

There are some conditions to be met before entering into the meditations and teaching involved in this level. The first of these is that the realisation of the emptiness of self must be well established in your practice in 3 ways: –

1. You are able to observe the flow of your thoughts, feelings and emotions without any sense of ownership.
2. You are able to observe the expression of preference, that is to observe the processes of your mind as it judges whatever is arising within it, without feeling the need to justify or buy into the judgements that your mind is making in any way.
3. You are able to observe the arising and falling away of the sense of self as you move through your daily life and when you meditate.

These 3 amount to the realisation of the sense of self as a construct of the mind. If this realisation has not fully arisen within you then any deeper exploration of emptiness will be viewed through the lens of the sense of self and further realisation will be difficult. It will be like trying to see through foggy lenses – outlines will be blurred and the true emotional effect of the meditations and teaching will be obscured. The practices will become more like intellectual exercises rather than emotional realisations. Please consider this before proceeding and contact me if you require any assistance or advice. I would also respectfully suggest that you familiarise yourself with previous articles on inherent existence and approaching emptiness as well as the “Emptiness” article written specifically for this level.

Practice 1 – The emptiness of memory. A 39minute meditation practice recorded in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 6th May 2022.

It is relatively easy to recognise the dependence of memory on the events of the present and how we feel in relation to those events and we all recognise how memory can be distorted by the passage of time. Whilst the importance of memory in providing a context for our present lives, and in many cases an anchor for the person that we think we are, should not be understated the concept of time that underpins our memories is much more significant in our exploration of emptiness. A moments reflection will reveal to us how significant time seems to be in our lives. It is in fact all pervasive providing a structure around which we can order and plan our lives to give us a sense of security, control and ultimately a feeling of permanence that distracts from the uncertainty and impermanence of life. In our first meditation on the emptiness of time we reflect on the concept of time as we use it in our lives and begin to look beyond the sense of solidity and permanence that it brings to realise that time is dependent on many things. In other words we find that time is empty and cannot inherently exist independently of all other phenomena.

Practice 2 – The emptiness of time. A 33minute meditation practice recorded with the face to face group in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 13th May 2022.

Practice 3 – Clinging to the concept of time 1. A 35minute meditation practice in which we explore how our minds cling to the concept of time in order to try and generate feelings of security and permanence and how that clinging can generate suffering. When we relax and let go of the tendency to cling we can begin to feel suffering diminish and gradually begin to realise the fundamental nature of suffering and its causes. Recorded with the online group on Thursday the 12th May 2022.

Practice 4 – Clinging to the concept of time 2. A 30minute version of 3 above recorded with the face to face group in the Ness Bank Church on Friday the 13th May 2022.